Hitting up the holidays fully in solo travel mode has amplified the deafening silence during the last few weeks, more so addressed the elephant in the room: that I am (in more ways than one) on my own now and that I need to come to terms with this fact sooner than later. I have been trying to cope and slowly getting there, I suppose. But overall, things are evidently much harder compared to how they were in the last 2 years (and all the years prior). The art of adapting is always hard to master despite my rich portfolio and long track record of frequent moving-outs. It takes a lot of patience and determination to be constantly and consistently motivated amidst the compounding effects of various factors from the weather & language barrier to the impending disaster posed by the phd challenge itself. And for that, I envy these Düsseldorf plane trees for a good reason, as they easily and effortlessly adapts through changing seasons, in style and poise, not to mention.
But if anything, this has further reaffirmed my independence; proving that I could indeed function, decide, and stand-by & accept the consequences of my choices. I guess being pulled out of that two-year old comfort zone is sad but is also freeing in some ways. So, cheers to moving forward! I wish we all achieve that tabula rasa of sorts that most of us aspire this new year!
